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| Today is a Good day |
When I first went back to work after having my son I had a little freak out and decided to stop working permanently in the Emergency Department and instead went to work in a more chilled out area of nursing. In my new role I was lucky enough to have a great team, set shifts 3 days a week, run my own clinics, work no night shifts and in a job in which, nothing really stressful (or life threatening) ever happened...... problem is... I realised a while ago (whilst doing a locum shift in ED) that I actually quite like the crazy stressful world of Emergency Nursing.... so a couple of weeks ago I returned.
It is just as stressful, fast paced, upsetting and wonderful as I remembered and I am so happy I made the right choice. One of the added bonus's of the job is my choice of only doing one 12 hour shift a week thus enabling me to spend more time chilling/baking/painting/playing with my son before goes to school.... which is magic!!! However, as he is still in nursery one day a week I also have an actual day off to myself for the first time in nearly 4 years!!!!
I have to admit, I spent so much time over the last 4 years dreaming about what I would do when I got 'me time', that now it is here I am finding myself a little giddy and overwhelmed with lists of jobs and plans I have been dreaming up.......
Needless to say it is all taking a little adjustment.......and one thing I have realised is I am not used to relaxing, this whole day seems like such a luxury and so alien........
So I am actually re-learning to release the gas (and mama guilt, that he is in nursery and I am at home.....he loves nursery)..... I have to keep telling myself it is okay to just chill, the house doesn't have to be spotless and this new time off can be spent finally reading some of the books that I have been longing to read since he was born., and blogging.... its all a work in progress!
5 comments:
Good for you! (And your son. And the ER!)
I'm so happy you have more time to blog.
You're one of my favorites.
Haha I have the same problem with relaxing. My husband calls me a “rubber band”. Maybe it’s because of the pace of New York and growing up here, all I know is to go, go, go and work, work, work. He always tells me to slooooow down so I am trying but it’s hard.
It’s good you’ve got more “me time”. Moms have really hard jobs! Relax guilt free!
Looking forward to more blogs from you!
Clarissa Pinkola Estes says...
"I've seen women insist on cleaning everything in the house before they could sit down to write... and you know it's a funny thing about housecleaning... it never comes to an end. Perfect way to stop a woman. A woman must be careful to not allow over-responsibility (or over-respectabilty) to steal her necessary creative rests, riffs, and raptures. She simply must put her foot down and say no to half of what she believes she "should" be doing. Art is not meant to be created in stolen moments only"
~ Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype
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Yes,having relaxing sessions quite needy but being Mom I also take my duties for growing kids on first hand. Even though now days grabbing some time for writing and reading blogs.
The best way I can think of to get into that space is to meditate- use the time to get a meditation practice started. For one thing, it can help you get started on being grateful for the time!!
Congratulations on getting a fabulous work/life balance- that's so important, and so elusive. You did it!
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